Delusions Of Grandeur: How About A Spot, Bro?

Gym Idiots At Work

You’ve no one else to blame if you step up to help some dildo try and move a literal ton of weight he can’t handle on his own.

Never in my life have I asked anyone to put themselves at risk to “spot” me. When some idiot totally out of his league asks me for a spot, I say no.

Oh, so now you don’t like me, stranger-without-a-clue, because unlike your mommy, I told you ‘no’? Now you’re pissed because I see you’re a fool and decline to put myself in harm’s way so you can inflate your ego with some false “accomplishment?”

Watch some “Gym Fail” videos on youtube to expand your knowledge of just how many entitled delusional jerkoffs there are in the nation’s gyms hurting themselves, hurting their spotters, and putting everyone in their vicinity in harm’s way.

Have enough self-regard and self-esteem to just say no to spotting and the insecure bully-boys who demand it, no matter how capable the guy looks.

Amazing Transformation: Pavel Ladziak

Polish citizen Pavel Ladziak's journey might just be the kick in the ass inspiration you've been looking for (click here).

How Old Is “Older”?

The Daily Mail has a pictorial of “older” men it terms “silver foxes.” All these guys are late 40s-early 50s. Considering the small percentage of the population that is in super-shape, as these guys are, I am impressed with anyone of any age who puts their nose to the grind stone and works hard to achieve their fitness goals, but especially those people over 40.

Having said that, being in incredible shape at age 50 is much more common today that say, 20 years ago. I do see men and women in their 70s online who defy all the underachievers’ justifications and excuses who could give these younger-older guys a run for their money.

Nevertheless, take a look (click here) and see if you are inspired by these guys to up your game in your efforts to achieve superior fitness.

The “Unfair Advantage” Charade.

If you’ve watched fitness videos on YouTube and scrolled down to the comments you’ve read the nasty poisonous whining and crying from those underachievers screaming “unfair advantage!”

Unable to get themselves to the gym—or even down onto the floor to do pushups—they are infuriated that others have managed to build impressive physiques while they struggle both mentally and physically to do so, and they lash out hatefully. 

Other underachievers do indeed go to the gym, but see no changes in themselves because they have no clue as to do their exercises properly. With the thousands of instructional workout videos on YouTube, there is no excuse for this. 

We all have witnessed the incompetency of others in our own gyms, and certainly the hundreds of “Gym Fail” videos on YouTube graphically attest to the gross idiocy of the many dangerously clueless among us.

The favorite “unfair advantage” argument is the unfounded accusation that anyone who has a better body than the whiners do uses steroids. The second-favorite excuse is the genetic advantage, meaning those who have built great physiques were blessed genetically in ways the whiners were not.

If you find yourself scrambling for excuses why you have not achieved your goals, think twice before exposing yourself, even as an anonymous online commenter. Understand how demeaning you’re being to yourself, and that most people, although they won’t tell you directly, see right through your charade.

Hey Pentagon! I Can Save You $Millions!

Business Insider has a story (click) about the deep-pocket Pentagon’s quest to develop “Super Soldiers” via futuristic technology like Super Underpants that made me giggle for it’s ludicrousness, mainly because American soldiers (and police officers) are, first and foremost, so fucking fat. If you live near a US military installation you know exactly what I'm talking about.

Dear General Pentagon Sir,

Want Super Soldiers? Put all military personnel on a mandatory diet and fitness program, no exceptions. The Pentagon dictates to military personnel how they can and cannot wear their goddamn hair, for fuck’s sake, yet not that they must be physically fit to fight?

You’re welcome.

Love,

Richard Sullivan, citizen and taxpayer.

The Military Times (click) has multiple stories fully acknowledging this easily-fixable issue.

Look Great In Your Clothes

We don’t work out only to look good in a bathing suit or naked. We work out because clothes look so much better on a fit body. The problem then is finding clothes that actually fit, because manufacturers refuse to adopt a universal standard for sizing.

S-M-L-XL mean NOTHING. Even within the same brand, let’s say Ralph Lauren or Abercrombie, a size M (medium) can vary wildly in cut and size. Additionally, tagging the item with terms such as “slim cut” or “athletic fit” does nothing to make shopping easier, especially online.

Most recently I purchased Perry Ellis chinos marked 32 that actually measure 34. The same goes for a pair of Ugly Bros. motosport pants. I have two pairs of almost identical A&F sweats, both marked “S”, one measuring 31 inches in the waist and the other measuring 34 inches.

Men’s dress shirts are an exception to this problem: a dress shirt is likely to be sized 16/33, meaning the neck measures 16 inches and the sleeve length 33 inches. That’s a nice start. However few dress shirts measure the chest, which is ridiculous. Measurements in inches/centimeters only make sense, and makes choosing a shirt online much more accurate than choosing a shirt that is only specified as size L.

Online returns due to size issues account for millions of wasted dollars, which could be avoided if clothing manufacturers would only adopt ACCURATE measurements in inches and centimeters for chest, shoulders, neck, waist sleeve and inseam lengths.

Returning things is a major pain in the ass and a needless waste of time and money.

Online shopping is convenient, but nothing takes the place of trying things on in the store because when it comes to looking good in our clothes after all our work at the gym, fit is everything.

The Professional Know-Nothings @MensJournal

These people have to justify their employment somehow, right? So it’s no surprise the avalanche of ignorant, stupid and worthless fitness “advice”, so-called, you can get online from self-proclaimed authorities who never show their face, much less a shirts-off photo of themselves.

This example of a piece of nothingness on mensjournal.com tells us how stupid we are to need a gym bag that holds those essentials we find germaine to our workout, because really, who needs to bring more than, according to the author, “sneakers, one full gym getup, and a Dopp kit."? 

The writer calls this product a “gym bag made by people who actually work out and know that you don't need a weekender-sized sack with a billion zippers and stupid features just to hit weights for an hour.”

Yes, forget your own personal needs!—forget that useless weight belt, fella! And those unnecessary workout gloves, lifting straps, knee/elbow/wrist wraps, towel, water bottle, ear plugs, protein shake/post-workout snack, eye drops, wet-wipes, your keys, phone, iPod, Beats, etc., etc., etc.

The underachieving dweeb who wrote this piece of fluff crapola reveals the low bar set for the hiring of online staff writers, if indeed these writers are actually even paid for his/her silly pronouncements regarding this obvious promotion deal with the manufacturer.

Nothing of any substance to see here at Men’s Journal, people: move on.

MORE Worthless Crap From GQ Magazine

GQ Magazine thinks THIS is a tricep exercise!

NEVER take seriously any fitness article that is not accompanied by a recent shirts-off recent photo of the author.  NEVER.

Online garbage has reached maximum density in a desperate attempt to attract clicks, and everywhere we are inundated with truly stupid useless crap attributed to non-entities and non-experts like "GQ Staff", rather than an individual with proper cred, such as a fit physique that readers might aspire to.

Here's a great example by the always-self-humiliating GQ Magazine: A photo of someone doing BICEPS curls used as an illustration of how to work TRICEPS.

My advice to VOGUE, Inc., GQ's owner: fire the least productive dolt on GQ's staff and hire a writer/graphic designer/editor who is a bona fide fitness addict — there are scores of qualified jacked individuals right there in NYC.

You're welcome. Send my $1000 consultant's fee to my Paypal account.