Disguising An Unfit Physique

GQ Magazines "Style Editor" Noah Johnson, photo courtesy Conde Nast.

One of the benefits to working out is looking good in clothes—any and all clothes.

Jeans. T shirts. A suit.

Who looks better in a $10 T shirt, the lean muscular guy or the guy with the dad bod paunch? The clothing industry trolls the most insecure population with the most expensive clothes, as if a thousand-dollar pair of YSL jeans will magically distract from what the whole world can plainly see.

It's a proven fact that people really do believe they’ll look better in the $100 T shirt over the $20 version, just like fat women think that a lot of expensive makeup and hair and crazy expensive manicures that include tacky artwork will disguise the fact they’re fat. Overweight guys and gals are told to wear “slimming” black or vertical stripes to successfully camouflage the excess pounds. No one is fooled by this:

Recently I’ve even seen a spate of articles online instructing both genders on how to dress in order to disguise a problem for which there can be no disguise, and this advice was not targeted at overweight people exclusively. Fashion advice for guys who are less than fit so as to appear more jacked than they actually are is one example:

YouTube video

It is true that the right clothes can do wonders for one’s appearance, but the opposite is true as well. The photo at the top shows the then-newly promoted editor of GQ STYLE Magazine Noah Johnson.

As Chandler Bing might say, “Could this guy be any less stylish?” Neither the jeans nor the T shirt fit him at all, but look at that fucking "belt"—it’s a goddamn shoelace. Real stylish there, GQ! Way to show the whole world no one in their right mind should ever be consulting GQ magazine for anything related to one's appearance.