Alfred E. Newman
With regard to people not taking care of the one and only body they will EVER have, I never hear likeminded individuals assign the same justification for their willful inaction when it comes to maintaining their car, their house or their credit rating. Allow me to apply their well-rehearsed fitness inaction spiel to a car analogy:
“I know I should take better care of my car because its condition is not only affecting my everyday mobility, but how bad it looks these days seems to be reflecting poorly on me socially. That’s unfair! Okay, I’ll confess I really hate going to the body shop and the mechanic, but who doesn’t? I don’t have the time, and it’s such a bother. So what if my car not only looks like crap but is barely limping along at this point—in fact it’s hard to start some days. But, hey.
“Additionally, as it continues to break down (with me doing nothing to stop it even though I can—I’m just not motivated), I find myself sinking further and further into deep shit. I can no longer go places I used to go, or do things I used to do.
"Having a car that barely runs, is dented, crippled by flat tires, and looks awful, yet is parked right there in my driveway for the whole world to see, affects my self esteem as well as my ability to accomplish the things I’d like.
“I can look all around me and see examples of car crashes happening to others due to their inattention and ignoring of basic maintenance, but I’m sure that won’t ever happen to me, for no other reason other than that’s what I prefer to believe.
When I see other people driving cars they keep in beautiful shape and running condition, well, it makes me mad because that’s an impossible standard that the average person has no hope of achieving! They’re throwing their sleek auto bodies and exceptional horsepower in our faces just to make us feel bad about the fact we’re ignoring our own cars! Most of us just don’t have the time and energy. When I come home from work, I’m exhausted. On the weekend I just want to chill. The last thing I feel like doing is maintaining my car.
“I expect my car to run regardless of my never getting a tune-up and ignoring oil and other fluid levels and the like. I did notice though, that once I got the idea to put kerosene in the gas tank rather than high octane, it really started affecting my car’s performance negatively for some reason. I haven’t figured out exactly why yet. What difference should it make what I put in the gas tank? I just don’t understand why I can’t just fill my gas tank with whatever crap I have on hand and still have my car run like new.
“Sure, in a perfect world I would like to drive a nice car that people would admire and that runs well, but I have no idea how to go about doing that, or even where to begin. Can you spoon-feed me? Can you hold my hand and walk me through it? Because I have no clue. It’s not like there’s some manual out there for how to take care of your car! It’s not like there are books and magazines and TV shows and Google and thousands of videos on youtube, or professionals I can hire who can teach me!
“Anyway, to sum up, I really resent being shamed for my car’s terrible condition due to my bad habits, poor decisions and lazy inaction. The fact I don’t take care of my car isn’t my fault—it’s a disease.”
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