Saturday, March 28, 2015


Hot Oatmeal shows up on everybody's health-conscious-heart-healthy-bodybuilding-power-food list. I’m not talking about the horrific crap pedaled by Quaker as “Instant Oatmeal”, so overloaded with sugar and artificial flavors and other unpronounceables as to be unfit for human consumption. Nor am I referencing the typical restaurant bowl of glue that has sullied hot oatmeal’s reputation - no wonder that so many people are turned off to what should be a delicious treat!
Make it at home using the naked one-minute variety and many of the same ingredients you’d put in Oatmeal Cookies, and a healthy beneficial breakfast will never sound boring again.
Put water in a saucepan.
Turn on the heat.
a handful of chopped walnuts or almonds
a dash of vanilla flavoring and/or almond emulsion
a teaspoon of cinnamon.
toss in a handful of raisins or dried cranberries
and/or a mashed banana.
and/or chopped apple.
Simmer a couple of minutes.
Add the one-minute quick-cook dry oatmeal. (Buy it in bulk at a health food store and save as much as half off the supermarket pretty-packaged stuff.)
Cook for a minute or more.
Pour into your bowl.
Add dark chocolate chips and mix to melt.
Then add your milk and sweetener: Sugar, Stevia, Splenda, maple syrup, honey, whatever.
Experiment to get the balance of your favorite ingredients to your own taste and there’ll be no reason for you to eat commercial CandyCereal for breakfast ever again.

Friday, March 6, 2015

Online Idiocy

Misleading headlines and uneducated “experts” are two of my pet peeves about the internet. Huffington Post is infamous for both. This so-called author’s crazily absurd counsel originally appeared in DETAILS magazine, which the Advocate hilariously described as “the official magazine for men who don’t know they’re gay yet,” but I digress.
Not only are online surfers exposed to these ignorant people convinced about their superiority over all others via their questionable knowledge and experience, despite their often being  barely out of their teens, but then we have the additional and troubling problem of those who believe anything they read.
There are no bad machines at the gym, just people who don’t know how to properly exercise. The gist of her article is that the machines are bad when in fact the author is herself in complete ignorance of the basics of proper workout form, period. And there she is, writing for a national magazine. God help us.