Saturday, May 14, 2016

Ask Your Beer Belly Where The Hell Your Penis Went.

Wheelchair Bodybuilding competitor Jason Greer.
And you thought YOU were having a hard time getting to the gym.

I like my penis and I like the idea that when I look down, there it is. I can see it. But there are millions of men who haven’t seen theirs in years — even decades. They carry around this huge, ponderous, balance-challenging belly, many even as a badge of honor. I admit I was at the same time both fascinated and repulsed finding out that there are women and gay men who have sexually fetishized men with huge guts. But that’s another story, best addressed never.

Health-wise big guts are a screaming red flag indicating imminent health danger. A big gut is also a major factor in falls in both men and women, both due to people not being able to see their feet and the tripping obstacles before them, but also because their center of gravity is thrown off balance. This means, hire somebody to patch your roof rather than climb up a ladder to tackle it yourself.

Other medical views include the belief that the beer gut is not filled with beer, or fat, but oftentimes with feces. That some people are carrying around twenty pounds of petrified shit 24/7 which cannot be expelled naturally, and they do nothing about that, is just downright disturbing.

As humans we possess an uncanny ability to adapt to diminished mobility and health. This fascinating phenomenon was highlighted in the ‘80s and early ‘90s when emaciated people with AIDS were admitted to hospitals with infections that might have killed a healthy person, but somehow they recovered. Despite being faced with life threatening challenges, in many of these cases the body was able to fight off infections, both bacterial and fungal, that no one believed the patient could ever survive.

Such as it is with all kinds of adversity. People adapt to a serious threat or inconvenience, especially if they believe they cannot overcome it. We endure by convincing ourselves that the adversity is only temporary, that we will somehow resolve it at some point.

We really can’t control much of anything, but we are in total control of what we ingest (eat, drink and inhale) as well as our physical activity. Old age is absolutely the wrong time to nurture a beer gut, whether caused by beer or not. We can begin resolving a big gut, which is as literal an obstacle to a great sex life as it is  to our health, mobility and safety, by reconciling that it didn't just happen suddenly, all by itself.

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